Amex Centurion card(caesar was a fair man).
I hate how when I’m trying to type the word ‘nigger’ into my iPhone it always suggest the word ‘bigger’. It catches on after a few times, but then it soon forgets. I’ve had this phone for a while now and typed many a thougt into it. It should know by now that I’m terribly racist.
I wish that when I actually typed a word that has a close spelling to ‘nigger’, it would suggest ‘Nigger!’(yes, capitalized and with exclamation point). I guess I wish my phone was racist.
Matter fact, I wish all machines were racist, for instance, the ATM. When a black goes to the machine to get money, the atm should laugh at him and say, “you sure you wanna do that? I mean we don’t give tens here buddy. I don’t wanna check your balance and you got exactly $20 dollars, then I wen’t through all that for nothing. Look, I don’t think they do loose cigarettes here and if they do they’re definately not menthols…what? whttp://www.tumblr.com/new/texthat’s that you say? Your a doctor? Sure, sure you are fella. On What corner in Brownsville?”.
And when machine does says this, it doesn’t say it in a dry Williamsburg waspy crackerass cracker way, but in a jew’ed out Don Rickles way.
[ed. note: i was going to post this with minor edits like add a comma somewhere, but i decided that would be trite. but i asked choc if he was alright with that. i also told him what he wrote made me feel nervous. to which he replied…]
Nervous? Why? Ok, use it and make changes, but the chink who wrote it will be mad.
And to answer your other question; [ed. note: i didn’t ask any other questions] if your [ed. note: i would have whitely/rightly changed something like that to “you’re”, but fuck that aight, i’m not saying anything, i’m just sayin tho] at an AIDS benefit cause of your girlfriends catholic guilt and one of the beneficiaries offers to shake your hand, it’s ok to give him a pound instead. But, have some wet wipes and a torch lighter ready, I mean, it’s still contact.
Me personally? I would just give them the old elbow bump in lieu of the fist cause there’s fabric over dat. If the dude’s name is Tremaine, don’t touch him at all, run! He is aids! If anyone protest to these actions, just flip it on them and tell them they’re not hip to the ‘jazz’ and are out of touch with the urban youth demographic they’re trying to reach.
If your girlfriend calls ‘bullshit’ on you, give a fag a pound and dare her on the spot to put your finger in her mouth. If she takes the bait, tell her that some ‘fag’ touched your cock in the bathroom and for her to ‘double up’ on the dare!
Yours till the money runs out
-Choc Blacula
P.S.- Do not touch any of the food there!
Not even the deep fried bacon rapped cocktail weiners!
you cannot find choc blacula anywhere and i suppose he might not exist. otherwise i would tell you to find him here, here, or just plain here.
